2024-04-12 12:54:17
You probably know very well what it means to feel a crush. You always want to be there for that person, your heart starts racing when you see the message they sent on your phone screen. You have also fallen asleep many times dreaming of a future with this person.
However, it can be very difficult for the other person to notice these signs of sympathy. Sometimes it’s just impossible to tell if someone has romantic feelings for you, whether it’s a hottie you met on a dating app you’ve gone on a few dates with, someone you just met at a party, or even a longtime friend.
But you know what makes this whole situation even more complicated? Most people try not to show their feelings because they’re afraid of coming across as desperate or too open, said a clinical psychologist who sits on the advisory board of Women’s Health and author of the book Dr. Chloe’s 10 Commandments of Dating by Chloe Carmichael.
“People become much more cautious because they don’t want to scare you and scare you away,” explained the specialist. Others hide their sympathy for fear of rejection, added Tamekis Williams, a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Mission Dorothy Female Empowerment Services.
That’s why it’s always beneficial (for all parties involved) to communicate openly with your crush. If you’ve been dating or even flirting for a while, and you’re sure about your feelings, start an open dialogue about it. T.Williams suggests starting such a conversation as follows: “Hello, I really like spending time with you. It is important for me to be open and not hide my feelings. Can I share my thoughts about our relationship? I just want to make sure you’re ready to talk about it.”
It’s important to clarify whether you’re sharing this just to express your feelings, or if you’re hoping for some sort of response. T.Williams added that you should only talk about your feelings, without expecting that the other person feels the same way.
But if you haven’t had a chance to talk about it yet, it’s natural to want to find out how the other person feels. Although everyone expresses their feelings differently, experts have identified 11 common signs that someone likes you.
1. He responds quickly to your texts and calls
According to C. Carmichael, if someone is interested in you, he will make it a priority to communicate with you, and he himself will initiate conversations on any topic. One particularly good sign is if he frequently mentions memories you share or jokes between you. “If during communication he keeps remembering your jokes or the details of the time spent with you, it means that he has a positive view of your relationship,” explained the psychologist.
The same can be said if it is particularly reliable. For example, if your car breaks down on the road, it will always answer your emergency call and come to help you. Williams said, “He’s going to interact with you differently than he interacts with other people.”
2. It’s important to him that your time together is meaningful
He might be diligently planning your next date, and then actually following through on those plans. Another good sign is that if your dates are interesting and thoughtful, he doesn’t spend every weekend at his house watching Netflix and spending that time trying to get to know you better. “He wants to communicate not only on the phone, but is also determined to make time for live meetings,” testified Dr. Shawntres Parks, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Women’s Health Advisory Board Member.
If the other person likes you, all his decisions will be carefully considered. “He will consciously plan the time he spends with you, consider how he should treat you, how he wants you to feel when you’re together,” Williams continued.
3. He asks interesting questions
“If he asks a lot about you, it shows that he wants to get to know you better,” Carmichael said. The questions aren’t limited to, “What are you doing this weekend?” and “How do you usually have fun?” Williams explained that the questions go deeper, and some even relate to your future plans and values.
According to C. Carmichael, such questions and conversations show that this person is trying to get to know you better than just a friend.
4. He admits he wants a relationship
Again, this may sound obvious, but if your conversations ever turn to what this person is looking for in a relationship, chances are they like you at least a little bit. “I would take that as evidence that he’s interested in you, and maybe he’s revealing it to you to see how you’re going to react,” Carmichael said.
5. You talk about past relationships
He is interested in your past relationships and wants to know why they ended, or he talks about his past relationships himself. “It probably means you’re interested in him. And he wants you to get to know him too. It also gives him an opportunity to find out if the problems he faced in a previous relationship can be repeated with you,” C. Carmichael did not hide.
However, the expert added that the stick has two ends: if he is too emotional when talking about his ex-partner, it may mean that he is still not reconciled to the end of his previous relationship.
6. He remembers the things you have shared with him
If someone likes you, that person will be extra attentive when you are together. For example, if on the first date you mentioned that you played tennis as a child, and on the second date he invites you to play this game together, this is a sign that he is listening carefully (and is interested). “It shows that he’s giving you his full attention, thinking about you and the things you share,” Carmichael said.
7. He wants to touch you gently
In this case, we are not talking about sudden and intense contact, because, as C. Carmichael explained, this can mean that he is only interested in you for sex. It is worth paying attention to a few different touches. Maybe he takes your hand when you have dinner, touches your back when you enter a restaurant, or hugs you as you walk down the street.
“This kind of physical contact shows his interest and perceived closeness. However, the restraint of such touches also betrays that he respects your relationship,” said the specialist.
8. He gets embarrassed around you
“If he’s uncomfortable around you, it might mean he just really likes you,” C. Carmichael admitted. T.Williams gave the following examples: maybe he laughs with excitement or smiles a lot.
Think about it, have you ever been on a date with someone who was too nice to you: wining and dining you, flirting a lot, and charming you in a different way? Finally, this does not mean that this person has feelings for you. So, if your new companion is often embarrassed, you shouldn’t underestimate him yet, T. Williams added.
9. He willingly shares his interests and abilities with you
When someone likes you, that person will want to show you all their abilities and positive qualities, revealed S.Parks. However, the characteristics of each are different. Maybe he’s a super attentive listener, so he’s interested in your day-to-day life. Or maybe he’s a true culinary virtuoso—he’s revealing his hobby (and probably trying to impress you) by cooking you dinner. “Whatever quality it is, he willingly shares it,” the expert testified.
10. He’s not afraid to spend when he’s with you
Just because someone spends a lot of money on you doesn’t mean they like you. But if a person is interested in you, they may consciously spend more money on your dates. He may not be able to afford to take you out to a restaurant every week, but he’ll gladly buy you groceries and take you out for a picnic. Or will save money on gas so he can come on a date with you.
“Meeting can sometimes become an expensive pleasure. Besides, it often seems to us that fancy dinners and fancy dates are a sign that this person is interested in us,” said T.Williams. However, this is not always true. In this case, effort is much more important.
11. He wants to get to know people close to you
According to S.Parks, a person who likes you will not want to hide your relationship. Not only will he not be afraid to go out with you, but he will also want to get to know your friends or community members. (Of course, he’ll probably be a little more cautious at the beginning of the relationship, but after a few months, that should change.)
Feelings for the other person can be scary, but maybe he’s also making an effort to show that he likes you too. But remember, the best way to find out how another person feels about you is to have a simple conversation.
Adapted from womenshealthmag.com
2024-04-12 12:54:17