2023-05-16 10:33:46
Today the capital celebrates the day of peaceful coexistence. Left-wing extremists don’t set cars on fire, vegans eat minced meat, climate stickers are embraced. The Column.
Go then! Kissing couple in the street during German Unity Day celebrations at the Brandenburg Gate in 1990.imago
This is the new installment of Anselm Neft’s humorous column Spot the Error. This text is a gloss and therefore does not claim any truth content.
Since 2018, May 16 has been celebrated worldwide International Day of Peaceful Coexistence. Especially in Germany and especially in Berlin, the day adopted by all 193 UN nations is very popular. Many great promotions and events are planned in the capital again this year.
Why suspicious and aggressive when it is much better to live together benevolently and peacefully? Cohesion instead of competition, with each other instead of against each other, friendly “Hello” instead of “Fuck off, post!”. That is the idea behind this beautiful International Day that at least 60 cities around the world are celebrating today. The initiative for this comes from the BMPPD (Association of Muslim Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts Germany), which campaigned for a day of this kind for years until a UN resolution gave the green light.
Maren Kaschner
To the author
Germany’s biggest minced meat party
One of the events is the Hackepeter Festival in Neukölln, where Christians, Muslims, Jews and Richard Dawkins believers enjoy the raw Berlin minced meat specialty together: sometimes kosher beef, sometimes halal chicken and sometimes properly chopped pork carcasses.
Newcomers from the Rhineland can bring their Mettigel, snobs their tartare and vegans can lie down with chopped meat. The Hackepeter Festival is mainly concentrated around Hermannplatz and this year is supposed to end with a big Mett-Einander-Happening. People from all cultures can strip naked and peacefully smear themselves with Hackepeter.
Road traffic with a difference
Even on the road today, people approach each other instead of driving into each other. The very latest generation of “climate stickers” attached to the streets today must not be shouted at, hit or harvested. Instead, climate adhesives are now lovingly cut into alternative hairstyles and made into tasty-looking heads of lettuce with various dressings, raw vegetables or leftovers from the Hackepeter Festival. The challenge “Our leek should become more beautiful” awards the most beautiful pictures of decorated climate stickers (m/f/d) on Instagram and thus contributes to the peaceful coexistence of dumb and dumber, young and old, environmentally conscious and FDP.
Left and right give each other peacefully
Left-wing extremists have pledged not to set fire to cars today, but instead to wash (cars and maybe even themselves). They also don’t want to throw cobblestones, but use soft-boiled pasta leftovers from the community kitchen as projectiles.
Expressions such as “bull pig” or “Nazi” are now replaced throughout the day by “Herr Wachtmeister” and “Björn”. Right-wing extremists, on the other hand, don’t want to beat anyone up today, but offer “free hugs” in selected places from Spandau to Marzahn. Not only willing passers-by should be hugged lovingly.
A holiday that could make school
On the International Day of Peaceful Coexistence, real estate speculators and unemployed people exchange apartments, old white men and young black women exchange addresses, and Julian Reichelt and Benjamin von Stuckrad-Barre share memories.
Everything is a bit more approachable and friendly. Ditches are bridged and children finally really see adults as role models. It’s almost a shame that it’s all over tomorrow. But Hackepeter is sure to be left in Neukölln.
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