2024-02-14 10:22:45
We frequently hear the term “toxic relationship”, something that can be distorted by being associated with the wrong situations. Psychologists warn of the importance of distinguishing and not trivializing a relationship that is harmful versus another that simply does not work.
Dancers from the Deborah Colker Dance Company of Brazil. EFE/ Christian Escobar Mora
Throughout any relationship, it is natural to have differences, make mistakes or go through bumps, which does not mean that the relationship is toxic.
A toxic relationship is characterized by the presence of harmful behaviors and significant imbalances derived from a situation of power or lack of respect for one over another, which can lead to a deterioration in emotional well-being.
Coinciding with the Valentine’s Day, the February 14th, In an interview with EFEsalud, doctor Pedro Neira, Psychology coordinator at the López Ibor Clinic, It explains to us what it means to have a toxic relationship and alerts us to the consequences and consequences of the trivialization or misuse of this term.
Toxic relationships can leave psychological consequences in those who suffer from it/EFE/EPA/Bernd Thissen
Relationship problems: not all of them are toxic
“Each person lives their relationship in a different way and that is why it is very difficult to distinguish which attitudes are considered completely toxic and which are not, because in the end it also depends on the importance and value it has for each person,” explains Neira. .
“But it is true, that there are disagreements or arguments that tend to occur more commonly in all relationships and sometimes, they simply need communication to be resolved,” he adds.
When a love is not reciprocated or in a relationship the spark is lost by one or both parties, that does not mean that the relationship is toxic. Yes there are different perspectives or future ambitions, that does not mean having toxic behavior with your partner.
“Listen without judging what my partner is telling me, what he is thinking, not trying to force the person to have my hobbies, my tastes, the same social circles…These are healthy behaviors for the couple,” says the specialist.
What is a toxic relationship?
The Psychology Coordinator of the López Ibor Clinic gives us the necessary clues to detect a toxic relationship:
- Control: If we detect that they want to control us, for example in the way we dress or who we interact with, it is toxic behavior.
- Lack of communication or aggressive communication: Aggressive or destructive communication can be another indication of a toxic relationship, but so can the fact that there is no communication.
- Emotional manipulation: Emotional manipulation, from constant blaming to victimization, can be a sign that the relationship is harmful to one or both parties.
- Social isolation: If one partner tries to isolate the other from friends or family, it is a form of control. This causes serious damage to the emotional health of the controlled person.
A love that not only provides company, but also nourishes mental health is healthy. EFE/Alejandro Ernesto
Advice for those suffering from a toxic relationship
For those who suffer from a toxic relationship, psychologist Pedro Neira advises:
- Recognize the signs and problematic functioning and accept that the situation is
harmful. - Look for Emotional Support from friends, family and professionals.
- Establish boundaries clear and communicate them in a firm and assertive manner.
- Work in the self-esteem and self-care.
- End the relationship if they persist.
Trivialization of the term “toxicity”
The trivialization of the term “toxicity” can lead to minimize actual experiences of abuse or mistreatment, making it difficult for victims to seek help or be taken seriously. Besides we can normalize toxic behaviors which in reality they are not. This label hinders healthy conflict resolution.
That is why it is important to emphasize that this colloquial and widely used term carries behind it functions and behaviors related to psychosocial factorswhich in many cases must be evaluated and addressed from a health perspective and environment.
Romantic love: expectation vs reality
Pedro Neira warns us about the problem that can be caused bythe idealization of romantic love and relationships.
“It is important to be careful with social expectations regarding the concept of romantic love, which generates an idealization of life as a couple and what we should expect from them, leading us to impulsive breakups by not meeting social expectations and to frustration and disappointment. discomfort,” says the expert.
Trust and respect are fundamental pillars of any healthy relationship. Image provided.
How to build a healthy love?
To avoid toxic relationships it is essential:
Learning to listen actively, express emotions clearly and honestly, and be able to resolve conflict constructively are crucial skills for maintaining a healthy relationship.
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