2024-03-09 05:19:18
Deep-rooted gender biases begin to be learned from childhood. Freedom from this poisonous inequality is the biggest desire of women from society and institutions. This is what women’s rights lawyer Mihira Sood has said in an article published in our associate newspaper The Times of India (TOI) on International Women’s Day.
Author: Mihira Sood
A Spanish couple on a world tour reached India. Last week, the couple was brutally attacked here and the woman was also gang-raped. Imagine, this couple had traveled to 63 countries, but they had never faced such an accident anywhere. The incident attracted widespread attention, with many social media users sharing their experiences of sexual violence in India. The chairperson of the National Commission for Women responded by accusing such users of defaming the country which is not befitting her position. Of course, India is not the only country where sexual crimes take place, but when someone travels by bike to 63 countries without incident and is raped only after reaching India, it is a matter of concern.
This should not be seen only as a law and order problem. What happens is that this crime is considered an anomaly that is committed by outsiders, and not a reflection of our social mentality. In fact, sexual crimes are merely the outward symptom of a deeper dysfunction within us: as a society we still have not been able to bring ourselves to treat men and women equally.
Theorists have posited that patriarchy originated with the beginnings of agricultural settlement and fostered a sense of ownership of wealth. The desire to transfer wealth from one generation to the next created a need to control women’s reproduction because without her there was no way to determine the parentage of a child. Thus began the strict surveillance of women’s bodies. . A premium was placed on the chastity of women, leading to a situation where the honor of the family became dependent on the women. On the other hand, women’s bodies become a battlefield for men. The haste to marry daughters at an early age, demand for dowry, son preference and female foeticide, honor killings, restrictions on basic personal freedoms etc. are still prevalent.
Many readers will hesitate to accept the above points. They will feel that these things are definitely for others, not for us. But if we look closely, the same is true even in our egalitarian life. As soon as the child is born, it is announced with a pink or blue color code that it will be a daughter or a son. From children’s toys to school subjects and activities, the line of gender inequality grows thicker. Then various aspects of career options and domestic life come into play. Here too, the traditional pattern of distribution of work on the basis of gender applies, for which preparation is done from childhood itself. Then we assume that these preferences are innate. What’s even more troubling is that we believe, and tell our children, that being quiet, obedient, and hard-working is what girls are, while boys are… boys. Girls are taught that their most valuable asset is how they look, that their ultimate goal is marriage, that whatever careers they develop along the way should be secondary to their husbands. She works for his happiness, she cannot earn more than him. On top of that, she can never say that due to job or business, there is lack of care for the house and children.
India ranks fifth from bottom in the list of countries where men contribute to household work. India also ranks lowest in women’s health and economic participation. Women spend less on healthcare, perform worse in health and nutrition surveys, and are outnumbered by men. While most surveys support women being given equal rights, when questions focused on equal pay, working mothers, the right to choose one’s life partner are asked, the answers change. We fail to recognize that That inequality is not just a question of different roles played by different genders. It is also a driver of violence against women. What appears to be a benign discriminatory behavior in a family becomes dangerous when multiplied a billion times. When women have less resources, less power, are less vocal, less visible in public life, it becomes clear how much men have shackled them.
Then our institutions are also representatives of our society. Unless we change, there will be no scope for any political initiative for better governance on the gender front. Politics can only see as far as electoral gains are concerned, and as long as our commitment towards women empowerment remains hollow, our politics will also remain limited. Look at the recent Uniform Civil Code (UCC) passed in Uttarakhand. Under the guise of women’s rights, a provision was made that adult women cannot live in live-in relationships without parental consent. According to a recent government notification, married women need their husband’s permission to use their maiden name.
Women are routinely being denied abortions, marital rape is still not a crime, the government is also strongly opposing it in the Supreme Court. At least 21 MPs have cases pending against them for crimes against women. Looking ahead to the 2019 election, there is a possibility of more misrepresentation as the anti-women campaign intensifies. The conclusion is that we are a country with deep gender biases and a truly toxic masculinity culture in which our boys have grown up. We are all victims of this. We are all guilty of this too. To come out of this, we will have to talk seriously on those issues which feel uncomfortable to face. There will be a lot of listening and learning in the process. This should be our commitment on this Women’s Day.
The author is an advocate of women’s rights.