2024-09-25 07:03:14
“I need a hug” (Timunmas, Planeta) is the title of the story, which is on sale on September 25, which helps children (and parents) understand what happens in the brain when they are sad and gives them tools so they can control it, like. and how important it is Isabel Rojas.
This is the first book in a series of four about different emotions. Sadness will be followed by joy, anger and fear.
A family “passionate” about human understanding
Isabel Rojas is the daughter of psychiatrist Enrique Rojas and the sister of psychiatrist Marian Rojas. With a smile he confirmed that even his grandfather was a psychiatrist, one of the first in Spain.
“Between humor and humor we began to think that there is a gene that makes us very likable, we are very interested in understanding people’s head, behavior and heart, I don’t know if it is genetic or not, but what is clear. It’s a love we all have,” said the scientist.
Isabel Rojas remembers that her father has written more than thirty books; his sister Marian, 3 “with a lot of influence.” He thinks that something is missing for children “because they are the future of society” and he thinks about what can be done to bring the world of emotions closer to children.
Cris and “Neurita”
“This is how this story came out about a girl named Cris, who has a neuron called Neurita in her head, she is like her friend and between the two of them they discovered,” said the scientist. And they did it because the girl was going to go to another city, so she had to leave her friends and school and she was very sad about it.
With the help of Neurita you will learn to control the feeling, to have the tools to be able to face it.
The book brings neuroscience closer to the child in an easy way. For example, he talks about cortisol, which is like a great hero that goes in difficult situations, but it can end up being toxic; or oxytocin, which is a magical spirit that releases the bubbles of love throughout the body.
“To understand is to cool. It gives us clarity when it comes to knowing what is happening to us, it is the key to being able to improve, change, and control our behavior,” said the author.
Children are pure feeling, pure mind because their pre-cortex – that ability to understand – is not fully developed, Isabel Rojas adds, and parents, many times what they try is to try to bring them to thinking , from obedience, yes because yes and no because no.
“There is a time when you are very sad with the child because he feels many emotions, but he is told to act in a certain way, not to cry, to stop crying, to behave well, but we have .to understand your feelings.” emotions and they understand them too,” he added.
Children learn what they see
It is absolutely padvocate for there to be a subject on emotional intelligence in schoolsbecause “there is a time when feeling is set aside to be pure.”
But not only children have to learn, but also teachers and parents.
“More and more knowledge with all mental issues (…) but I think we are starting to enter the world of late emotions. Today’s children who have these problems are the children of parents who do not have that cognitive experience, that emotional intelligence. I think that if parents don’t know about emotions, it’s difficult for children to know,” said Isabel Rojas.
And, the psychologist explains, children understand by what they see, not by what they say.
“If a father calls to his son because he is tired, he has done a hard day’s work, and what comes out is ‘brush your teeth and go to sleep’ with a whisper, in the end, the son will be tough. time to learn to control their emotions too,” he insists.
Lack of emotional intelligence in childhood causes, among other things, that it is more difficult for children to gain self-confidence, because parents put their wounds on them and want them to be perfect.
“From this perfection, this insecurity is generated, especially in girls, that they are beautiful, responsible, fun, that they know a hundred languages, that they play I don’t know how many musical instruments. And I really recommend to see their faces again, playing in the park, laughing, doing silly things. I want them to get to where they want to go, but in a very pleasant way,” said Isabel Rojas.
The society is immediate
And this is also where the need of today’s children in ‘for here and now’ comes into play because “we live in a society of immediacy, and there is no tolerance for pain.” And there is a point, in the scientific mind, in which we believe that we can do and achieve everything and, what’s more, immediately.
“We have to re-educate our children to know how to stand”emphasizes the scientist, although at that time they may feel some pain, in fact, ““We are increasing their tolerance for frustration and we are sure that they know how to recover more quickly in the event of any injury they may suffer in the future.”.
The Importance of “No”
Therefore, encourage parents to keep saying “No” in mind, telling their children that they cannot do that, and explain why.
Isabel Rojas said: “Parents are afraid if they make the child work, but if you say no and explain why they don’t, they know what to do, they and know why they should do so.”
What is learned in childhood will be what is learned by the youth, the “exciting” level if you know how to manage it, you can get the “rough diamond” from the youth: “you have to start with small bricks since they are available. are very young (…) we have to give them the tools so they know how to face life. “
However, “it is never too late to learn”, neither in youth nor in old age, but it is better to do it as soon as possible.
Cell phone, ticking bomb
Is cell phone friendly? Isabel Rojas is clear: “We know that the exposure of children to the screen causes serious developmental problems,” she said.
However, you know that we are in the 21st century and we work with computers and interact with certain materials, but considering “these two derivatives” it is in favor of the next best.
“You don’t give your kid a hint of coke when he’s 8 years old, right? Well, the phone goes through the same neural circuit as drugs. You wouldn’t give them to a 16-year-old either, but there is a point from that age onwards when the child is more aware and can control impulses. But, I insist, the next time is the best,” said Isabel Rojas.
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