2023-05-02 14:12:00
Your mother’s sister died of breast cancer, you were sensitized accordingly. When you were 30 you were diagnosed with breast cancer yourself. What was going through your mind at that moment?
I had already had a bad feeling because I had read a lot beforehand. But at the moment of the diagnosis, I was just shocked – although I actually reacted totally sober. The moments when you feel really bad, they come later.
How did the breast tumor feel?
It was lumpy for me, I couldn’t classify it at all. My gynecologist is technically very competent and experienced, but even he said before the ultrasound: ‘It doesn’t feel like a tumour’. Breast cancer is not always easy to diagnose, even for a doctor. It is all the more important that you know your body and can recognize what is normal and what is not.
How did it go then?
The gynecologist will refer you to either a breast center or a radiologist. To get a diagnosis, you need to do a core biopsy. A syringe, i.e. a needle, is inserted and a piece is removed. Based on the examination, it is then evaluated what kind of tumor it is and what kind of therapy is suitable.
Did you get the diagnosis of breast cancer there?
No, three days later my gynecologist called and said he was sorry to tell me it was breast cancer.
Fear as a constant companion: “You are only considered cancer-free after five years”
How was the breast cancer treated in your case?
Chemotherapy and surgery are usually recommended for young people or more aggressive tumors. I did the chemotherapy before the surgery: I just wanted to get the worse behind me. The benefit of this is that you can see if the tumor will even respond to the chemo – because that’s not certain. With me you could see that the chemo actually had a good result. Then comes an operation in which the tumor is removed. Some do it breast-conserving, in my case the breast tissue was completely removed and silicone implants inserted. Then comes the radiation, which I actually tolerated quite well. Right now I’m doing hormone therapy, which suppresses estrogen. My tumor is hormone receptor positive, which means it feeds on hormones.
What are the side effects?
If you have side effects, then these are symptoms that actually only occur during the menopause. At first I was really sad: As a 30-year-old woman, you don’t necessarily want to think about the menopause. But since I was always in total pain during my period and I’m not allowed to have children right now anyway, that somehow makes the therapy more bearable (laughs).
How long does the therapy last in total?
I have to do hormone therapy for at least two years now. Then I could interrupt if I want to have a baby – but I don’t know yet if I dare to interrupt the therapy for that. It’s five years in total.
That’s a long time…
Yes, with cancer it all takes so long. The chemotherapy lasted several months, then came the surgery and then the radiation – with breaks in between. Then the hormone therapy started, which lasted five years. With chemotherapy you think, ‘This is the worst.’ It’s logical, it’s been really bad for four months, but it has to come to an end. Everything else takes an insanely long time, which puts a lot of strain on you.
Does that mean you have to wait until the hormone therapy is over?
During the operation, the tumor could be removed so far, but logically, with cancer you can never say exactly. To be on the safe side, a mammography or magnetic resonance imaging is done every six months. However, you are only considered cancer-free after five years.
Dealing with fear: “Fear of death is a really bad feeling”
Were there moments when you were scared to death?
Yes, I still have. I wasn’t an anxious person before, but fear of death is a really bad feeling. Even though breast cancer is a type of cancer with a good chance of survival, I saw with my aunt at the time that you can really die from it. That certainly made me have a different fear than anyone else. At the time it felt like I was in the wrong movie. I have never taken health for granted and have always lived very healthily. A diagnosis like this pulls the rug out from under your feet all the more. Health is the most important thing. You just have to be happy for what you have.
You raised the issue of family planning.
I had previously had a strong desire to have children. Of course, that has been toned down a bit because other issues are important now. But basically I definitely want children. For cancer, cryopreservation can be done before chemotherapy as a safety measure. Of course, you have to think about family planning when you have cancer, it’s stressful.
How are you currently? How are you dealing with your breast cancer?
I’d say I’m generally fine with it. Of course, there are those affected who do not want to talk about it. But it’s extremely stressful in a situation like that to pretend nothing happened. So my strategy is to address things directly. This made me see that cancer is a topic that is also very common among young people. It’s also kind of a relief to see that you’re not alone.
We wish you all the best.
Note: The text was first published in a modified form by “Futter”, the young magazine of the Kleine Zeitung. “Futter” is now “Kleine Zeitung Next”.
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