Photo: Column Caroline Burghout
DEN BOSCH – Carolien Burghout is a Nursing Specialist Hematology and PhD candidate ‘Care in the last years of life’ at the Jeroen Bosch Hospital. In her column you get an insight into her work.
“What a beautiful family you have and how nice that you brought photos to the hospital”, I say as soon as I enter your home. The tone has been set. You talk proudly about your three children. They all have a special place in your heart. “Do you see elements of yourself in your children?” A nice conversation ensues. Later that week I will be at your door again. The nurse comes to me. “He doesn’t want to see anyone, maybe you should try another time”.
Two days later I try again. I am bringing a colleague in training. You say: “I was completely through it for a while. I’ve had enough of all the people coming in and out of my room wanting something from me.” “Is that why I was asked to come back another time?” I ask. “Too bad,” he says disappointed. “I would have loved to see you that day.” I don’t understand very well. In my opinion, I also want to know everything about you: how you are doing, whether you are taking your medication properly or how things are going at home. The difference becomes clear to me when you go back to our conversation from the week before. We then spoke of you as a person and father, not of you as a patient. You did well in that conversation. As you say this, you fill up. Your words touch me too. I just don’t know what to say. We leave a pleasant silence, after which a nice conversation follows.
When my lecture and I leave the department, we talk about this special conversation. It has not left us untouched. Patients want to be seen and heard as human beings. As a healthcare provider, we play an important role here. We can grow in this every day. This conversation teaches us that, in addition to healthcare providers, we can also include ourselves as human beings in patient contact.