Taylor swift is too skinny, lizzo is too fat, kylie jenner’s lips are too full, but before they were filled with whatever, they were way too thin. The outward appearance of pop stars and celebrities is under constant observation. And is constantly evaluated. Recently, the singer Ariana Grande has become the focus of body talk: fans have repeatedly expressed concern about their figure on social media. The singer has apparently lost weight and looks slimmer. Users on social media, gossip media speculated about Grande’s body and a possible eating disorder – only she herself had nothing to say.
But now Grande has spoken up on Tiktok. In a video, she addresses the rumors about her body. “I don’t do this kind of thing often, I don’t like it,” Grande begins. “But I wanted to address your concerns about my body.” Grande said she wanted to talk about what it’s like to be “a person with a body” who also gets a lot of attention. “We should be gentler on each other — and less comfortable commenting on other people’s bodies. It doesn’t matter what it’s about.” Even if the intentions are good, if you’re worried or want to give a compliment. Regardless of whether it was about whether someone was fat, thin, sexy or not sexy. “We should learn not to do that so much anymore.” You can also learn to simply ignore things you don’t like – not everything has to be commented on.
“News! I am getting older!”
Again and again people in public have to defend themselves against the fact that others gossip about their appearance without being asked. It is not only women who are affected by this, albeit to a greater extent. The lead singer of the band Echt, for example, Kim Frank, was a teenage heartthrob in his early teens, adored by many young fans mainly because of his smart looks. He’s not that young anymore, his hair isn’t as full and he doesn’t look like the cheeky guy with the blue eyes who made girls’ hearts beat faster. “News! I’m getting older,” Frank wrote on Facebook a few years ago. He just had enough of the articles that expressed surprise and excitement that he looks different today, maybe less normal. “I like myself more now than I did then,” says Frank.
Foreign body ratings are often disguised as worries, as with Ariana Grande. “Is she seriously ill?” It is then asked. Grande says what fans thought was her healthy body wasn’t actually healthy. “I was on quite a lot of antidepressants and still drank. I ate poorly.”
The supposed concern of strangers is an assault
And even if a person has an eating disorder, it’s not the job of strangers to talk to them about it. It’s the job of doctors to treat them, and it’s the job of friends and family to have face-to-face conversations rather than diagnoses. The supposed concern of strangers is nothing more than an assault. A public rating they are not entitled to. Even if Ariana Grande had an eating disorder, do people on the internet really think her comments would persuade the singer to seek therapy? Do you think they are the ones Grande would confide in? As if people affected by illness wanted to discuss it with every complete stranger.
Also, a person who has an eating disorder often knows for himself that something is wrong with him. She doesn’t need worried comments from around the world web pointing her out as well. In the case of anorexia, comments about how thin someone has gotten can actually make it worse. There are many anorexics who want to be as thin as possible.
Now, Ariana Grande has a lot of money and power, and is also commonly considered beautiful. Even if it hits her just like others when her body is talked about, blasphemed, judged, she can shield herself from it, she doesn’t have to give herself to the social media comments and can also get from the negativity out there with professional help at least keep your distance. Normal people can’t do that. The woman who is approached for her body on the train cannot choose to only take a taxi to work from now on. The one whose colleagues quietly suspect an eating disorder may not have the strength to defend herself against it.
For these women, a role model like Ariana Grande is important. She says: It’s nobody’s business how I look, how I dress, how my body is shaped. Even if I’m famous. This is even more true for non-famous people, ordinary people. Because, as Grande rightly says, they exist in their bodies. They can’t get out. Women’s bodies in particular are still treated as if they were freely available masses that need to be judged. Maybe keeping such judgments to yourself is a first step. Ariana Grande is right: we should all be gentler with each other.