VEGHEL- After her very heavy cancer treatment, Astrid Groenevelt returned home in 1994. Physically she was a wreck. Family and friends kept her going, sometimes literally, by looking after her and her baby. One of those friends was Elsbeth Slippens. She continued to assist Astrid, also with the health problems that would present themselves for decades. It was the reason for Elsbeth to set up ‘shit or shine’.
Astrid was operated on in 1994 to remove the cervical cancer. After the operation there were complications and she was seriously ill. She went home to recover, but was barely able to take care of herself. “I remember Elsbeth asking how things were going. I replied that I was glad I could make a cup of tea,” recalls Astrid. “A few months before that, I was still a healthy 34-year-old woman. After my first treatment I was physically and mentally exhausted. In the beginning I was kind of ‘numb’, but gradually you realize that your whole life has changed. You really have to learn to give that a place.”
Distribute energy
Processing what had happened to her: Astrid never got around to it. It soon became apparent that the cancer was back. Again, grueling treatments followed, which, as it turned out later, led to permanent physical limitations. Like many ex-cancer patients, Astrid also struggles with severe fatigue. Still, she was eager to get back to work. “I did that too. I had a nice job with very understanding colleagues. But I feel like I had to miss out too often. I felt guilty about that. In the end I gave up my job. Then I started thinking about what gave me energy and what I really wanted. That was a make-up course. I started following them in Amsterdam. That took a lot of energy and meant that I couldn’t do other things. But the training also gave me a lot of energy.”
Shinen
Through trial and error, Astrid had to learn where her limits were. “I noticed that I liked to dress up for a party, for example. When I dress and make up nicely, I feel better. But I was also honest with others and myself. Was or am I somewhere and it’s not going well, I’ll say that honestly. It is important to name what you feel and think. Of course I have also noticed that not all friends and acquaintances understand that you are tired or not fit. But by being open and honest, I have gained a lot of understanding. And I’ve learned that it’s okay to take care of yourself.”
make it negotiable
Astrid is happy and proud that shit and shine exists. “It is important that more attention is paid to the issues that people with chronic cancer or ex-cancer patients encounter. Many people find it difficult to talk about that. But that is very important and does not always have to be loaded. Shit or shine wants to support women openly, honestly but also positively. It’s nice to talk to women who recognize themselves in what you’ve been through. I also think it’s good that you can find coaches who support you through shit or shine. Cancer has taken a lot from me, but it has certainly brought a lot. Due to the illness I have reinvented myself and I realize that you should especially enjoy the here and now.”