It is not only at Christmas that the motto is: always celebrate!

by time news

BerlinThere used to be more lametta. Before when I was a kid. My mother decorated the tree with a lot of tinsel, and that’s how she still keeps it today. The tinsel has to be silver, of course. Because the shiny metal strips are supposed to symbolize icicles hanging from the branches in the winter forest. With my mother only silver balls come on the Christmas tree.

It’s different in the family that I started myself. At the request of my wife, the colors red and gold dominate our tree. Even the tinsel – it shouldn’t be too much – glitters golden.

Two families, two views of tinsel. Unimportant? No. Such supposed trifles can be debated at length. That shows how much Christmas is shaped by traditions. Much or little tinsel? Invite Uncle Klaus or not? Nice or useful gifts? And should they be bought on the internet or do we prefer to save a few shops in the neighborhood from the Corona-Aus?

Everyone celebrates at the same time, but very individually

Christmas is a special festival. No spontaneous party and none of those celebrations that take place only once in a lifetime, such as youth consecration or confirmation. Or more rarely like weddings, for example. Christmas means: every year again. Everyone celebrates at the same time, but very individually.

Christmas is the big feast of the family, at the same time a great stress test: the weeks of searching for gifts, baking, buying a fir tree, finding the tree stand again. Some are annoyed because they have to save up for the festival, others debate whether it really has to be the expensive organic goose. And when everything is done, quite a few families have the annual quarrel on Christmas Eve. The first question arises: Why are so many participating? And also a second question: Why do people actually like to celebrate so much?

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The chocolate industry reports: 160 million “hollow figures” were made for this Christmas party.

There is also a surprising theory that explains partying as a social big bang that helped turn people into community. Before explaining the theory, a few more facts about Advent: Many major festivals have religious roots, including Christmas. Nowadays, however, the birth of Christ is often no longer the focus. Christmas is also the festival of marketing and buying – and the longest festival in the world.

Christmas starts in August, then the casting work in the sugar processing industry begins. The two halves of the Santa Clauses are poured from chocolate and joined together. The industry reports this year: We have made 160 million “hollow figures”. A record, five percent more than the year before, which was also a record year. Association head Carsten Bernoth has an explanation for why sweets are booming in the pandemic of all things. “In uncertain times it becomes clear that confectionery is one of the little joys of everyday life.”

In the shops, the most important shelves are always at the cash registers. There the rule applies: When the grill utensils are put away, the Santa Clauses follow. “So that people don’t complain too much, the dealers usually wait until September 1st,” says a saleswoman. “Then the meteorological beginning of autumn.”

Other figures: Germans buy 25 million Christmas trees, eat 5.3 million geese and 86,510 tons of gingerbread. According to surveys, they want to spend an average of 273 euros per person on gifts. The big buying frenzy is expected to bring sales of 112 billion euros to retailers – around 20 percent of annual sales. Alcohol consumption has increased by 36 percent and three times as much cocaine is found in sewage in some cities. Shortly after New Year’s Eve, Germans weigh almost one percent more on average – a plus that most people don’t manage in any other week.

Animals don’t celebrate

And almost everyone participates. Just why? Because celebrating festivals is a deeply human affair: animals don’t celebrate, except in animated films. Humans are social beings. Most prefer to work in a group and suffer from loneliness in the home office. Often they gather in denominations. And many people don’t like to go on vacation alone. For many, a visit to a restaurant is one of the little highlights of the week or month. Christmas is the highlight of the year.

Meike Watzlawik, 46, is familiar with human coexistence. The cultural psychologist is a professor at the Sigmund Freud University in Berlin. “Celebrating together has a great symbolic meaning for many groups, no matter how big or small the group is,” she says. “A celebration is almost always a ritual, and rituals are important because they are constitutive of a group. They first create the sense of community and consolidate it with every celebration. “

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Christmas is officially the festival of love and family, but especially in families, there are often arguments on such days. There are reasons.

An example: A couple never celebrates Christmas, but when they have children, they usually invent their own Christmas rituals and thus strengthen the new family. “Most festivals have a ritualized process,” says Watzlawik. “And the fixed framework gives the group a secure structure. Most look forward to it because they know what is happening when and where. “

If you ask friends and relatives, you will see that for many celebrations are an escape from the monotony of everyday life. Finally the worries are forgotten, the unfinished business, the conflict with the boss.

“Recurring shared experiences are meaningful for a community,” says Watzlawik. No matter whether for the family at Christmas, for the believers in the church service or for the fans in the stadium. This also applies to the weekly get-together, the monthly reading group and the annual class reunion.

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Argentinian football fans: Many people seek to be with like-minded people and like to celebrate with their families.

Feeling belonging is a central motive of human existence. Family members meet, talk, and learn news. And regardless of whether they are cheerful or sad: They trigger emotions that the family in turn shares. This is how shared memories are created.

Not all of them need the celebrations equally. “It’s like a church service,” says Watzlawik. “For some it is a compulsory exercise, and others have high expectations.” This is a reason for disputes on the holidays. “As a ritual, Christmas in particular is associated with strong emotions. It is not called the festival of love for nothing, but it is sometimes a festival of controversy. “

The problem with this is this: Most don’t talk about their expectations, and when they find that others don’t share their expectations, frustration arises. “Disappointments arise from unfulfilled expectations,” states Watzlawik.

And what about more exuberant celebrations, such as Christmas parties with colleagues? “They also have a high symbolic significance,” says the cultural psychologist. “The colleagues celebrate themselves for what they have achieved in the year. They do something good for each other. That makes sense for the group. ”Unlike at work, they drink alcohol, are relaxed and don’t just talk about business. And they let you know at home: “Don’t wait! It can get late. “

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Christmas parties of companies usually follow fixed rituals: First the bosses give a speech, but at some point the atmosphere is left out.

Christmas celebrations – rather rare this year due to the pandemic – are ritualized: colleagues meet in a special restaurant, at a special place. The party begins with the boss’s speech. “But it is usually not too stiff,” says Watzlawik. “The bosses usually do not praise their own performance, but that of the workforce. The message is: Today you can really celebrate – and we celebrate you too. “

Then the dishes are served. “After the second wine, the mood becomes more relaxed and everyone breaks the conventions that normally apply in the office,” says the psychologist. The behavior of the bosses is also of symbolic importance: “If you buy expensive wine, the message is: You are worth it to us.” When the bosses say goodbye after a while, they symbolically give the party free for the exuberant part. “These are forms of appreciation. They should bring the group together emotionally and socially. ”What if the bosses stay? “Then they break out of their executive role, sit with the employees at the counter and drink beer – very friendly. At eye level.”

The formal disappears, as does the tie. Now spontaneous behavior is not only allowed, but desired: emotions, laughter, dancing. Some people switch from you to you, and the boss sings along at karaoke.

Is the company party the legitimate framework for the small border crossing? “Yes,” says Watzlawik. “It is almost expected that everyone will be very relaxed.” But everyone also knows that they will leave the state of exuberance afterwards. In the office you reign again the next morning, some embarrassedly lower their gaze because they drank too much or danced or snogged too much. All of these will be memories that will be exchanged at the next celebration.

Which came first The bread or the beer?

Shared experiences, ritual celebrations and intoxication – some researchers see this as a root of human coexistence. Even before the Stone Age people settled down and built villages, they established ritual places of worship. The oldest known to date was excavated from the mid-1990s on the Anatolian hill Göbekli Tepe – under the direction of the German prehistorian Klaus Schmidt.

12,000 years ago, people there moved huge stones for the temple. The archaeologists found tub-like basins in the rock, which for a long time nobody knew what they were used for. Then researchers discovered deposits of beer stone: The basins were used for brewing. And there were many animal bones. Researchers such as evolutionary biologist Josef H. Reichholf suspect that large parties were celebrated with up to 1000 participants, real feasts – mind you, among hunters and gatherers.

Up until now it was considered that people settled down for other reasons: their clans grew and grew, and the collected wild grain was no longer enough to feed everyone. So people settled down and started farming so they could bake more bread.

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Visitors to the Gobekli Tepe archaeological site in southeastern Turkey.

Perhaps that part of the story needs some correction. Perhaps our ancestors collected wild grains that got damp, then the sun shone on them and with the natural yeast in the air everything fermented into a kind of original beer. The ancestors tried it, found the effect splendid and repeated the procedure. The intoxication became part of their ritual festivals, so the crowd of temple builders who wanted to celebrate grew. Soon there was not enough wild grain to quench the great thirst. So they planted the seeds for the ritual intoxication themselves.

Perhaps hunters and gatherers did not become farmers at all, but brewers. Perhaps it was not the bread that made us settle down, but the beer. In any case, there is probably no archaeological evidence that bread came first – and all cultures celebrated ritual and intoxicating festivals.

Watching a few movies all by yourself in your pajamas

That’s the theory. In today’s practice, the Christmas trees are decorated again, the last gifts are wrapped and the first geese are pushed into the oven. But not with all. Not with Christa Keil in Friedenau. “I keep hearing what a pitiable creature I am because I celebrate Christmas alone,” says the 73-year-old Berliner. You have children and grandchildren and associate the festival with the best memories. But in the previous year it was different – due to the corona. “I stayed at home alone and thought it was good. It gave me a warm feeling of solidarity because it happened to so many. “

This year she does it again. She prepares a few goodies for herself, opens a bottle of wine and watches a few films in her pajamas. “I’m looking forward to it,” she says. “I feel a little sorry for all of these stressed out Christmas families. And I’ll see what will happen at the next festival. “

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