Monday, November 28, 2022, 10:07
Talking about sexuality after sixty usually leads to the appearance of a series of labels and false beliefs associated with this stage of life. It is true that due to aging, a series of biological, psychological and social changes begin to take place that also occur in sexuality. In reality, it is a period of change of the different capacities, some deteriorate, others are maintained and others even improve. That is why we must address sex at this time in life trying to detect possible deficiencies and enhancing the advantages of this stage.
It has always been taken for granted that people in this age range lose interest in sex, stop masturbating, and even that it is physiologically impossible to have sex. The truth is that sexuality and affectivity is something inherent to the human being, no matter how old you are. The interest and sexual desire do not disappear in the elderly, but it is transformed and will depend in most cases on external aspects that will make the sexual experience be interpreted in a more or less positive way.
The sexual experience in this period of life will depend not only on biological factors, but also on psychological and social aspects. How you live and face the possible obstacles of this stage will be a good predictor of the degree of satisfaction in our sexual life.
Some keys to enjoy and improve sexuality in old age lie in solving some problems or difficulties that may appear:
1. Fight the lack of desire.
There are many elements that can help combat the possible reduction of desire. We can introduce arousal enhancers, such as music, candles or erotic literature. Paying special attention to our appearance and hygiene is also important, at this stage and at any other. Something that can also help rekindle the passion and ignite that spark again is the use of sex toys. Specifically, couple toys are a good alternative, since they allow both of you to be involved and bring new games and practices to your relationships. Experiencing and sharing new forms of pleasure will also generate a greater predisposition to have sexual relations.
2. Find solutions to the lack of lubrication.
Experiencing vaginal dryness is also quite common. The use of lubricants and increasing the pre-stimulation time will improve this aspect. Pelvic floor exercises and having frequent sexual activity also favor increased lubrication.
3. Provide alternatives to erection difficulties.
In the face of weak erections we can act by also increasing the stimulation time. Another ally can be taking advantage of morning erections and choosing positions that allow easy insertion of the penis. It is a good time to get rid of genitality and give free rein to all those alternatives that exist in the face of penetration. For erection losses and the increase in the refractory period, it is also very useful to emphasize quality, not quantity, looking for activities and forms of stimulation that do not require an erection.
4. Compensate for the absence of a sexual partner.
The lack or absence of a sexual partner can be a factor that makes it difficult to maintain the desired sexual activity. In situations like these, there is always the option of complementing self-stimulation with the wide range of erotic toys on the market. We can choose toys that give us a little push when it comes to increasing and lengthening the stimulation or go further and look for some more sophisticated ones that allow us to experiment even more with our pleasure individually.
In summary, having sex after 60 can be very beneficial and increase the quality of life. One of the advantages associated with this period is the sexual experience acquired throughout life. Over the years, it has been possible to experiment and learn to know one’s own sexual response in a very deep way, and it can be much easier to achieve moments of intimacy that are not only based on penetration. It is a good time to give the value they deserve to displays of affection, global body contact and communication. By having more free time and the fear of pregnancy disappearing, sexual relations can take place with greater disinhibition, which is difficult to achieve at other times of life.
By Rosa Navarro, sexologist at Diversual