“The Boyfriend Experience”, or how to afford the perfect guy without touching it

“The Boyfriend Experience”, or how to afford the perfect guy without touching it

2023-06-10 11:32:37

Regulars of dating sites are well placed to know: the perfect date does not exist. But if it could be bought? Not agreeing with her girlfriends who “complained that the good ones are all already taken”, Sarah Fordebras began during confinement to think of a way to “give men and women a good time”. She thus founded The Boyfriend Experiencea site that offers to hire a boyfriend by the hour, for a price starting at 175 euros, based on a concept that exists in particular in Japan and to UNITED STATES.

No way for her to speak of a system ” escort ” Nevertheless. “It is often associated with the negative, with the prostitution, to something dangerous. Rather, I propose a real human encounter, in which we don’t talk about sex at all,” clarifies Sarah Fordebras. The contract is very clear, both for the boyfriend only for the client, and put in writing in advance: no physical relationship. In meetings, “the feeling is natural and placed at the right cursor together”, testifies Alexandre, boyfriend since a few months. “We know that we will not go beyond a certain course”, and by remaining attentive to the signals, the boyfriend can “steer the meeting differently”.

And boyfriend in the friendzone

“I can’t control the attachment, but you can also project yourself with your plumber or your shrink,” smiles Sarah Fordebras. If the appointment can take the form of a more or less scripted date, the romance is not mandatory, since “anyway, it’s the friendzone”, she supports. Moreover, even if the idea could be evoked on the spot of a first date, “but more for a dinner or the accompaniment to a party”, Alexandre has never had a second date with a client.

The young man, who “works in personal care” next door, highlights “the unique experience” that a moment with a boyfriend, even the “strong emotions” that can be created. And the clients, even if they “know that the relationship is superficial”, lend themselves to the game, rejoices Sarah Fordebras. These clients are mostly “women over 35, earning quite a good living”, and who may be “married, singles or divorced!

Entertain and listen

“It’s not new and it’s been around for a long time,” says sociologist Janine Mossuz-Lavau, research director at the CNRS and Cevipof, who picks up on one of the services offered by The Boyfriend Expérience : accompaniment to parties or exhibitions. “In some circles, it’s not great to come alone,” she says. On the contrary, arriving in the company of a handsome young man, “it’s very rewarding”.

Sarah Fordebras identifies two types of clientele: “women who just want to be entertained, spend an evening that changes, go to a party”, or discover Paris in the case of some tourists, and women “who feel alone and need someone to listen to; they are the ones who need the service the most. » The ability to listen is therefore the key to being a good boyfriend. “You have to have an understanding of human relations, because each client is different,” notes Alexandre.

Boyfriend custom made

“The kindness, the kindness and humour” are thus the main qualities of the ideal (false) boyfriend requested by the clients of Sarah Fordebras, who adds, laughing “and that he knows how to cook”. Requests that may seem basic, but “if these women are about to rent men, it’s because the men they’ve had before haven’t necessarily been nice, so that’s naturally part of their requirements”, explains Janine Mossuz-Lavau.

In the form that they complete, clients are invited to detail as much as possible their requests and what they expect from the boyfriend. “Speaking Portuguese, playing the guitar, or reading poems”, quotes Sarah Fordebras, who then makes a preselection which she sends to her client, like a good “booker”. THE boyfriend chosen will then do its best to stick to the requests. “It’s a tailor-made support, but all the upstream work must not be visible”, says Alexandre. This need to “renew” and the “chameleon side” are part of what he likes about the job: “It’s partly a job of actorlike Alain Delon, who can play several roles while putting his personality into it, ”he says.

Still, the boyfriends offered by the site are, let’s face it, damn handsome. “It’s true,” laughs Sarah Fordebras, who quickly regains her seriousness. “It’s like an agency mannequin their business is appearance”, and as the Boyfriend Experience “remains a paid service” (expensive), “it seems obvious to me” that the client will want a Brad Pitt or equivalent, she justifies. “I am aware that there is a certain injustice, and if clients ask for more normality, I have nothing against the idea, the service can evolve. “I would like to have more diversity », and moreover « I am recruiting! “, she adds, full of mischief.

“We pay someone for the time spent in your service, we do not rent a body”

The one who first hired in her circle of friends specifies that she wants “the elite” and affirms that “human value” remains the number one criterion. It also puts forward an “approach feminist bringing more “balance”, both by “performing women a service and reminding them that good men exist”, while giving men a role model to “behave better with women”. There is a side “I do what I want” which “reverses the roles”, confirms Janine Mossuz-Lavau, even if Sarah Fordebras insists on the mutual respect between the boyfriend and the client.

The entrepreneur also dreams of “opening up ideas in society”, does not close the door to male clients and hopes one day to be able to hire women from men, “but there are too many bad habits”, particularly related to this famous image of the “escort” that Sarah Fordebras wants to take off. With this service, “we pay someone for the time spent in your service, we do not rent a body” since there is no physical relationship, approves Janine Mossuz-Lavau. “All kinds of trades personal services come back to that, ”she says, citing nurses and housekeepers. So play the accompanists at a social evening, “is it so different? asks the sociologist.

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