2024-07-25 01:22:31
Three tips from personal development experts on how to overcome self-doubt about whether you deserve your success
“The right person” is a special project of “24 hours” about professional success, career growth, personal development, workplace relations, about good practices of employers, about news from the HR sector and management, about the labor market and vacancies .
You handle everything brilliantly, you have reached a high position at work, you are expected to get a promotion soon. And yet you can’t shake the suspicion that you may not be as capable as you need to be. Now everyone is congratulating you and patting you on the back, but soon they will realize that you don’t deserve it.
If you have similar concerns, then you suffer from the so-called “impostor syndrome”. Extremely successful people also experience it – even more often than mediocre ones.
According to researchers, imposter syndrome occurs in those who set ambitious goals.
They achieve another and raise the bar higher, then again and again. They never stop to enjoy their successes and ultimately are never satisfied with their achievements. In the tension of the continuous striving to fulfill their big plans, to meet their own and other people’s expectations, they begin to fear whether they are “fraudsters” – whether they are smart, talented, insightful enough to make the right decisions in order to succeed this time as well .
In fact, in the name of the syndrome, and in its essence, there is a dose of irony. People who doubt themselves are not frauds. Rather, fraudsters can be called people who think they know everything, evaluate themselves as super capable and smart, brag about non-existent achievements. The fear that you may not have enough strength to cope with a high goal is a sign of maturity and intelligence.
This is the first thing that psychologists advise to realize people who are struck by the so-called. the impostor syndrome.
The second is to realize that they are human. And fear and doubt are a natural part of human nature. Only idiots have no fear, only fools have no doubts.
The third tip is to reject the doubt that they are successful not because of their efforts and abilities, but for luck.
Yes, luck is important, but in most cases its “credit” is for the failures. It is possible for a bad coincidence or something small, unforeseen, uncontrollable to fail the plans of even the most prepared person. In normal societies, however, many rarely does the opposite happen – the good chance to ascend and hold on to the top an incompetent person. Successful individuals create their own luck by thinking ahead, working hard, taking measured risks. (How Luck Syndrome Affects Career Success)
Then it is clear what to do with the impostor syndrome. It is approached as a problem to be solved – with analysis, strategy, plan and concrete actions.
Yes, the bar is set high this time too, but that never stops people who want success.
—— Female disease ——
Women suffer from “impostor syndrome” more often than men. Not that the stronger sex is immune, but these doubts are inherent usually in the weaker sex due to evolutionary reasons. It suits even ladies who are at the head of world-famous corporations or have made a head-turning career in the cinema. Facebook boss Sheryl Sandberg and actress Jodie Foster share that they have experienced it.
Men are naturally more confident. Also, the millennial tradition of being leaders has dulled their impostor syndrome. In women, it is exacerbated by the opposite experience, because they are used to being performers rather than individuals with their own success, with recognition, with a high position. Therefore – again shaped by the millennial tradition – they tend to be underestimated.
Usually, climbing the hierarchical ladder in their profession has cost them a lot of effort. Despite the chants of equal rights, even in the most developed societies, a woman being preferred as a boss over a man is still considered the exception rather than the rule. There is also the feeling that luck played a big role.
Thus, the fear that they may not be at the required height naturally haunts women more often.
In “The Right Man” you can read more:
A messy desk – big obstacles to career success
When the boss presents your ideas as his own
7 deadly sins of partying with business partners
Segregator or Integrator – an important mindset for success
10 things confident people do and achieve success
Lack of self-confidence – the worst deficit for success. Exercises to get it
How to shoot a fellow schemer
Know when to wave goodbye to this job
The logic behind the mantra “Don’t think bad so you don’t get bad” that brings success
The 10:90 rule or how your reaction in just 1 event leads to 9 troubles