45 minutes ago
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General
ZWOLLE – What appears to be a burnout turns out to be a form of dementia. Mark Dekker (57 years old) is one of the people affected by this disease at a young age. He was diagnosed 6.5 years ago. Talking is now difficult; his wife Jolanda Struyk tells on behalf of both of them. “You don’t see anything in Mark, but he can do less and less independently.”
Bills remain unpaid, Mark asks for a new pin code every now and then and at work he forgets one thing after another. Overworked, a burnout, what will it be? It does not occur to him and Jolanda that it could be a form of dementia – Mark is in his late forties at the time. His forgetfulness is getting worse. “When we discussed during dinner that we could have an ice cream for dessert, a few minutes later he casually took the yogurt from the fridge”, Jolanda recalls.
Clarity
Mark goes to work with notebooks, mindfulness and psychotherapy, but nothing changes. ‘When I found out that he called the doctor three times in one day to make an appointment, I knew that something was really wrong,’ says Jolanda. Moreover, the always interested Mark was less and less interested in the ups and downs of those close to him. It was not until a year and a half later that he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. “The doctors wanted to rule out all other options first. I understand that they are careful about putting a ‘label’ on it, but for us it was a relief. Finally clarity”, says Jolanda.
The reactions in their environment vary. One offers help, with the other they encounter suspicion. From ‘Does Mark still recognize you?’ to ‘but I don’t see anything about him’. “That’s the complicated part,” says Jolanda. “We want to help older people anyway, but someone who is young and fit and still just gets on a bicycle, that doesn’t fit the picture we have with someone who could use help.”
experience
What outsiders don’t see is that, although Mark takes the bike, he doesn’t find his target. “When Mark goes to the glass container, he comes back with ‘the glass container is no longer there’. So he can’t find it,” explains Jolanda. “His eyes work, but the images are not processed properly. Fortunately, he still finds his way home.” His brain continues to deteriorate. “Besides being forgetful, not processing things or not being able to find something, he has lost his sense of time, has difficulty having conversations and doesn’t know what to do at home,” says Jolanda. “If I don’t give him anything to do, he’ll go to the bathroom a hundred times in a row.”
cosiness
Some things don’t change: Mark is still a sociable person and likes to run. He smiles when Jolanda starts talking about the daytime activities he goes to three days a week. “Cycling”, he answers when asked what he likes to do there. And walking. The group is mixed. From young to old. Nice, Mark thinks it’s there. He is happy that there are people of all ages. Because going to a sports club with the elderly is nothing. Although… “Then I’ll win”, he suddenly remarks sharply. When Jolanda laughs, he laughs too.
Autonomy
The couple regularly meets with other couples, one of whom has dementia. “In contact with fellow sufferers, half a word is enough. The Jungheimercafé was recently launched in Zwolle, for young people with dementia and their loved ones. A nice initiative. More attention should be paid to this group. Moreover, it would be good if people could still stay with their employer with some adjustments. They lose so much autonomy otherwise.” For people in the same situation as Mark and she, Jolanda has a tip. “See others. Talk about it. The more people know about it, the better they can take it into account.”