Violeta Urtizberea she plays Tetris: she arranges the token for the family reunion in the garden of her three-year-old daughter Lila, with the schedule to pick her up at the colony; while she embeds the rehearsals and functions of “Inferno” (Astral Theatre), with those of the one-person “A house full of water” (Dumont4040, in April). It is not all. Another token falls: the premiere of “Self-defense”, the film by Italian Andrea Braga, which he filmed immediately after the pandemic and which meant for him to breathe freedom again and enjoy his job. The hectic schedule, he says, is what makes his job difficult and makes him anxious.
News: After so many years of career, is that instability still hard for you?
Urtizvera Violeta: On the one hand, I love it and that’s why I choose it. There is something of uncertainty and not knowing what will happen, of not always being surrounded by the same people, which for me is also linked to freedom. But I don’t know how my economy is going to be in two months and that generates anguish, of course. And what anguishes me the most is that, since I don’t have a routine, I always feel like I’m forgetting something. The schedule changes all the time and I have to accommodate myself and apart from that I have a daughter, there is another life that depends on me. So many times I go to sleep thinking about things and that works against me to fall asleep. That tetris overwhelms me and it is what costs me the most, and many times I find myself worried, with a frown. With Juan (Ingaramo, his partner), there is a more masculine issue that he knows deep down that I am there. He is super present, but there is something of the organizational that falls on me.
News: As a mother, are you trying to give your daughter a more fixed structure?
Watermelon: It definitely has to have structure, but I’m still laid back. Lila is the daughter of artists, she sleeps late, gets up late, sometimes she eats at any time (laughs).
News: She says that it was difficult for Lila to sleep well and that, in turn, she remembers that in her own childhood, the moment to close her eyes and rest represented a challenge for her. What does that have to do with?
Watermelon: Look, I don’t want to sound corny but I really like to live (laughs). I love getting 8 hours of sleep, I need to sleep; but my satisfaction is when I see that the hours that I have to sleep have come to an end and I have to wake up. I like to make plans, I am very excited about life, so when I went to sleep it was always: “Oh, no, don’t stop my mambo, I want to stay a while longer!”.
News: Something like life against death, the “what happens if I fall asleep and don’t wake up”.
Watermelon: Yes, it is a moment where you find yourself with your thoughts, you have to surrender. And I am quite controlling and I think a lot, my head does not stop me. I even went to hypnotists. It’s a big issue in my life, it takes me a lot of time how I’m going to go to sleep, what time and what time I wake up. And since I can remember, that happens to me. It is frightening, the moment of insomnia is maddening because the head does not stop and you feel that you cannot fall asleep.
News: The work that brings us to this interview, “Inferno”, raises the question of where is hell. It seems that this is the moment of hell for him.
Watermelon: Absolutely. The work precisely has many elements related to nightmares and dreams, there is something very dreamlike, not knowing if it is fiction or reality, the scenery is super nightmarish. It’s a very unique experience, I feel like there isn’t anything like it on the bill right now. It is an intense work, there are no more layers and layers, it is half Borgesian. You need an attentive viewer but you also have to give yourself up because sometimes you need to understand everything and in this proposal if you don’t understand something, nothing happens because what matters is the experience, what happens to you with that.
News: I suggest you play with the seven virtues that the work works on: faith, hope, charity, temperance, justice, prudence and strength. With which one do you have more affinity and which one do you feel is still far away?
Watermelon: (thinks) I think I have a bit of all of them, because I’m prudent, I’m not super risky and I don’t like to parachute (laughs). I don’t have the typical religious faith nor do I have the astrological or metaphysical faith, but I do I have faith in people, in love, in psychoanalysis, I have my little places of faith. And hope too, I don’t consider that everything is lost or anything like that, but because I believe in human beings. And justice is one that is complicated in the world in general, but I think there is justice for people: if you’re half a jerk, you’re going to be left alone; and if you are a good person, you will have more love around you.
News: He found a great love, right?
Watermelon: Yes, I’m very much in love.
News: How is this couple built, which has been going on for 8 years?
Watermelon: It came at the right time because I feel that each one of us had lived enough experiences. Going back to the above, it was hard for me to have faith that love would last. My parents separated when I was two years old, they always had rather short couples. So I re-believed in love and passion; My parents always instilled in me that if something is dead, it must be finished. There was a lot of teaching about passion, about living it to the full, but not about making it last. And that was and is a lesson today for me. I’m more used to “That’s it, let’s finish it because we can’t stand each other”. And Juan is a little more conciliatory. And yes, we fight a lot, we are very passionate. I fight and I think it’s over forever, I pack my bags and things like that; like this from minute one that we got engaged.
News: And how is the situation reversed?
Watermelon: In general, it is Juan who comes to seek reconciliation and for me, when the fever of the moment has passed, it has passed and that’s it. But I’m going to sleep in another room; Before I used to go to my mom’s, now I don’t because I realized that she scared her. But we fight less and less. Since we had Lila, everything has calmed down a bit. And there’s something: I still like him and I still like him, and that’s mainly what keeps us together.
News: What happens when you are on stage?
Watermelon: And… it’s very difficult to put words to it, there are many feelings together but let’s say it’s a place where I’m happy and I flow, I need it, I can’t stop doing it, there’s something of a need to be there.
News: We were talking about freedom before, does political correctness end up being suffocating?
Watermelon: It is something that I think about a lot, that I have it very much in my head, to go against everything established. And being a woman and close to 40 years old, as to what is expected of me. I really like to dance and have fun and I think about it a lot, like “I’m already a lady to do such and such a thing”, and I say: “No, no!”. It is a subject that summons me. With women, that look is doubly prejudiced, that “excesses at a certain age are pathetic”…
News: Like the criticism of Moria Casán for her posting in a bikini.
Watermelon: It’s the most ridiculous thing in the world, but for me it has to do with fear, with that thing where nothing strays too far from what one knows because it causes panic.
News: Could it be that in the attempt to open and break, conservatism ends up appearing?
Watermelon: Yes, of course, that happens all the time. I see friends who have open partners and they get super fundamentalist and it’s “Whoa! Nothing is like this or like that! ”, Each one finds the way back as he finds it. Enough of having to tell you how to do things. For me it is a constant search and I am attentive to when I myself fall into that trap, I observe it and try not to let it happen to me.