Only a surgical mask protects his anonymity – with the help of fogged up car windows on a freezing winter day. The young Afghan suddenly finds himself in this state within the reach of armed jihadists, the very people whose presence in the streets has pushed him to remain holed up at home for several months. It is the first time the former bodyguard has been on an extended drive in Kabul since going into solitary confinement in August after the Taliban overthrew the US-backed government and was serving.
Amid Kabul’s busy traffic, groups of bearded fighters wave to the car to pass, unaware that there is a wanted man in it. Rows of white Taliban flags and blast-proof concrete walls, recently painted with slogans touting the Islamist victory over the United States, testify, at every street corner, to the control exerted by the new regime, and remind Mr. A (who asked to remain anonymous for security reasons) the reasons for his hiding, of which he sees no end.
Some friends of his former security service unit, who protected senior officials, were captured by the Taliban, accused of being part of the competing Islamic State, and executed, he said, before adding:
” It’s very difficult. Not a moment goes by that we don’t think about the situation and what the future holds. If I don’t leave Afghanistan, I’m sure my destination is death. They are going to kill me. »
hide to survive
Mr. A. is only one among many other Afghans whom the flash victory of the Taliban has forced into a clandestine existence. Last August, anyone linked to the former government, or engaged in civil society to defend women’s rights, the rule of law or even the education of girls, became overnight a de facto enemy of the state, and a target for the Taliban in their hunt for those they label as “infidels”.
Like one human rights activist we interviewed, the former bodyguard told the Monitor, in Kabul, how he had to adapt to a new life in Afghanistan by hiding to survive. A lifestyle marked by anonymity that now surrounds their entire personal and social life, to protect not only their physical integrity, but also their deep beliefs and the people they were.
In great detail, they talk about their disrupted lives, with this feeling of being a prisoner which amplifies their fears, their uncertainties and their shattered dreams – feelings which invade their mental field, even as they seek ways to make a new start in life elsewhere in the world. They often wonder just what they are waiting for, or even how long they are willing to stay hidden. According to Mr. A, of the 2,000 people in his unit, only the “better placed” were able to escape thanks to the airlift set up in confusion by the Americans in August. The potential targets of the Taliban in Afghan society being very varied, there are, at the very least, tens of thousands of Afghans who are currently hiding in the country.
Murders and disappearances are often reported
The Taliban did declare a general amnesty in August, but this commitment seems to be frequently flouted, with murders and disappearances often being reported. Reuters reports that, according to the UN mission in Afghanistan, since August 15 a large number of former Afghan government officials, members of the security forces and people who worked with the international military contingent have been killed by the Taliban and their allies, despite the amnesty. “Human rights defenders and media professionals continue to be subject to attacks, intimidation, harassment, arbitrary arrests, ill-treatment and assassination”, says Reuters, referring to the UN report.
“We who live in hiding cannot trust the promises of the Taliban”
So says Mr. A, who, therefore, only agreed to be interviewed in the relative darkness of a moving car, and on condition that he does not go to three districts of Kabul where he runs more risks. to be recognized by the Taliban. Indeed, the visit of a stranger to his home – which would have allowed us to see what constitutes his daily field of vision through the one-way mirrored windows of his apartment – would have risked compromising the safety of his family. When asked how he kills time, he explains with a laugh that he sleeps all day, worries all night, plays cards or games, and regrets not being able to “recharge yourself mentally”, despite television and the Internet.
As dangerous as this car ride through Kabul is, he relishes the change it brings to his monotonous routine, especially since the prospect of an escape abroad has receded since the attempt to a friend to apply for a passport for him failed. The Taliban leader has indeed insisted that “the person be brought to us”before finally keeping the originals of the documents. “I have nothing to be happy about”, confides Mr. A, who adds jokingly:
“I don’t think you will recognize me one day, because I will have become a poor idiot, laughing, sitting under a tree. »
Vanished, the “dream of being able to flourish in life”
A recent university graduate, Madame Z, who has led an active fight against gender-based violence, for the emancipation of young people and for the restoration of peace in a society torn apart by forty years of war, must also deal with the consequences of his past life. Today, she has a new, ideologically neutral job, and still tries hard not to change her dress too much from what she wore before, despite new Taliban rules that advocate traditional attire. She only leaves her house to go to work. Her “clandestine” expresses itself in a different form, and aims to mask what was its “dream of being able to flourish in life”.
“I completely hide my past”, explains Madame Z, who spoke by telephone so as not to have to visit a stranger in full view of everyone. She deleted her social media accounts, along with online references to her former activism. “All in all, this goes against the opinions of these people. [les talibans]. » She can no longer rise up against the injustices she sees on a daily basis, which generates a deep feeling of frustration in her.
This is how she was stopped recently at a checkpoint by a Taliban fighter, who pointed out to her that the clothes she was wearing implied that she was not “not allowed” to sit in the front seat of the van, as she sat there to enjoy the sight of the falling snow on her way home from work. “That night, I didn’t sleep, it was so crazy! I cannot describe or express what I felt that night… I was humiliated”she says.
Being able to do things and not being able to do them
“If I was alone, I would do a lot of things, because I studied and I want to work in my company. But now it’s not just me that matters.”, explains Madame Z, who has given up on leaving Afghanistan to be able to stay with her family. “It’s very frustrating to want something, to be able to do it with the physical and intellectual means, but not to be able to do it because a few people are stopping you. It hurts, especially when it comes to your values. » Of the 13 members of Madame Z’s group of friends, only two young women remained in the country. Madame Z concludes:
“Afghanistan was taken back twenty yearsshe says. Among the people who have studied, most have left the country, and those who have not are hiding. »