Lavender Soap Theory: TikTok Explained

by Priyanka Patel

The “Lavender Soap Theory” Reminds Us to Savor life’s Simple Pleasures

A growing trend on TikTok encourages individuals to embrace the present moment and enjoy their cherished possessions-before it’s too late. The “lavender soap theory,” born from a poignant story and amplified by social media, urges a shift in perspective: don’t save the good things for a “special occasion” that may never arrive.

The concept gained traction in December when TikTok creator @rio.mads shared a video showcasing a stylish outfit, stating, “Lavender soap theory: Was saving this Issey Miyake top for a special occasion but would rather wear it now.” She succinctly captured the essence of the theory,adding,”Clothes are meant to be lived in.” Another user, @kythegoofygoober, exemplified the principle by sharing, “Letting my boyfriend use my Olaplex conditioner as of the lavender soap theory,” choosing to share a luxury item rather than reserving it solely for personal use.

While seemingly new, the underlying idea resonates with a long-held gratitude for enjoying life’s finer things.Many already prioritize using their best dinnerware, favorite sweaters, and silver cutlery regularly, recognizing that these items enhance everyday experiences. Artist, content creator, and Mean girls star Rajiv Surendra, who shares similar sentiments on YouTube, has garnered thousands of views by reminding audiences that surrounding oneself with gorgeous things enriches life.

The Heartbreaking Origin of the “Lavender Soap theory”

The “lavender soap theory” has deep roots within the BookTok community, but its emotional core stems from Sarah J. Maas’s The Assassin’s Blade, a novel within the Throne of Glass series. The story centers around a heartbreaking scenario where the protagonist initially refuses to allow her partner to use her expensive lavender soap before embarking on a dangerous mission.

As one commenter explained on a TikTok video posted by @megmarleneeshe, who herself depicted an emotional reaction to the theory, the core message is to “use your nice things without waiting for a special occasion as life can be abruptly changed and you may never find the right occasion, so use the nice lavender soap.”

The tragic consequences of withholding this small luxury are vividly detailed in the book. Another TikTok comment recounted the story, explaining that the partner ultimately dies on his mission, and the protagonist is left consumed by regret, haunted by the fact that their last interaction was a disagreement over the soap. She is left with the lingering scent of the cheaper soap she insisted he use. As one commenter poignantly stated, “There’s an amazing masterpiece of a book called throne of glass and the main character basically never lets her bf borrow her lavender soap and one day he gets murdered and when she hugs his body he still smells like the cheap soap she’d make him use.”

Embracing the Present Moment

What began as a discussion within BookTok has evolved into a viral “theory” on tiktok,serving as a powerful reminder to live fully and appreciate what we have. The central tenet of the lavender soap theory is simple: allow yourself to enjoy the things you own.

The theory encourages a shift in mindset. Why save a cashmere sweater for a special event when it can bring comfort and joy on an ordinary trip to the grocery store? Why let a favorite lipstick expire unused, waiting for an occasion that may never materialize? Why store a perfectly fitting pair of jeans, destined to remain unworn? The logic is clear: what is the point of possessing beautiful things if they are not enjoyed?

The lavender soap theory extends beyond personal enjoyment, inspiring acts of generosity and shared experiences. It encourages individuals to spoil loved ones with small treats,share favorite items,and create lasting memories. Sharing a favorite candle or indulging a partner with a cherished snack fosters connection and strengthens relationships.

ultimately, the “lavender soap theory” is a gentle yet profound reminder to savor life’s simple pleasures, embrace the present moment, and share our joys with those we cherish.

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