Overcoming the Challenges of Menopause: Regaining Focus and Motivation

2023-06-16 13:32:18

It’s only been a few months since I felt like as I got a little older, I was clearly going back to a state of childhood: the world is me. I actually had little ambition left, I thought it was all right, all I wanted was to surround myself with nice people, good books and good food. And take that. Like a larva.

I didn’t know if I should be happy with this development. It seemed to fit the transition, the phase of life in which you withdraw more and more from social life and rest and contemplate in good harmony. Only: I am 51, I still have more than fifteen years to go. No worries, I thought at first. I prefer to write, so I can still stay at home, read and write. But the latter was no longer possible. Because of that same transition, my brain had turned into a kind of mud that it was difficult to toss through with wellies on. I had the attention span of a fruit fly. Where I used to be in a bubble of hyperfocus and hours of pleasure at work, I now stared at the blinking cursor on my screen, after which I opened Facebook and that of a grower for new plants for the garden and that of Bol. To buy even more research books, which I couldn’t pay attention to either.

I couldn’t do it anymore, I didn’t count anymore

It was not long before general malaise set in. I couldn’t do it anymore, I didn’t count anymore, who would remember my story by the time my book about the myths surrounding motherhood finally came out. Who was I still? At all.

I started to delve into what the transition does to the women’s brain. A lot just appeared about it, because March 8 the H3 network was founded: a psychiatrist, cardiologist and gynecologist joined forces because of exactly this problem. All those women around fifty who struggle through the day listlessly, who no longer keep up with their work, who are declared burnout or depressed. Hormones play an important role, and their disappearance during menopause. But with hormone supplements or stimulants, for example, there is so much that can be done about it.

Stimulants made me back to my old self

I went on the dopamine boosters and I’ve been back to my old self ever since. Better yet, mentally much more balanced, but with the energy and decisiveness of a young girl. I exercise every day, don’t collapse in the evening, but walk in and around the house to see which job I should tackle now and in the field of work I am developing myself enormously. Together with my colleague from Saar Magazine, Maike Jeuken, I made the podcast ‘As if divorce is so much fun’ and there was a world of knowledge to be gained. We had to edit ourselves. Which is not that easy if you don’t know the program. Until I went on a course to learn it really well and then got so much fun that I was suddenly bursting with ideas and inspiration. Learning something new is so much fun! This was a whole new way to tell stories, audio is awesome, the possibilities are endless! I bought a good microphone, a good headset and together with the recording and editing program Logic Pro on my laptop I have my own sound studio.

And now a new podcast is in the works, about that H3 network and their research, the results of which will be published soon. And I already have an idea for another one that I can do on my own. I once again followed a course day at the podcast festival Causes in Amsterdam and was taught by masters such as Stef Visjager who wrote the podcast Making an Opera made. I shook the hands of all those people who hand out subsidies and already told about my plans. Maike and I are thinking about starting our own audio collective. And I can’t wait.

But first I’ll finish that book. My life’s work. You have to.

I’m back. Susan 3.0. Back in business.

This column previously appeared in Saar Magazine.

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