There are titles that are a little more surprising than others, even ones you would never expect too see. Such a headline is undoubtedly the one that the newspaper “Bild” dedicated to an article on the former footballer Rafael van der Vaart: “I have never seen Ronaldo’s penis”, we read – and, sorry, we are only quoting. One would never have thought that such a statement could become a front page headline because the vast majority of the world population, at least the male population, would have signed the sentence.
But van der Vaart once played at a club with Cristiano Ronaldo and came close to that. But not close enough: “I always jokingly say that Ronaldo is the only player whose penis I have never seen!”, he told “Bild”. And why? Why Ronaldo didn’t give him the chance: “He entered the pitch first. And the last to leave.” And it wasn’t worth van der Vaart staying longer in training just for this. As for Ronaldo, the question arises: was what was widely praised as the highest level of professionalism actually just a secret?
Dieter Hermann, Uschi Glas’ husband, comments on this topic - no, not about Ronaldo, but about secrets – in “Bunte”: “The only secret I have from my wife: that I love her even more than I always tell her. Very heartfelt, even if not exactly courageous as a public confession. Surely for the readers of “Bunte” the sentence would have been more emotional: “That I love her a little less than I always tell her”. But we fear that Uschi Glas also reads the “Bunte”.
Who wants cute gnomes?
“The Golden leaf” informs us about the Christmas customs of the kings of this world, including Margaret of Denmark: “And during the holidays she always creates sweet paper elves for her family. Can there be a better gift?” After looking at the photo with the elves,we would say: yes,yes. Certainly.
Joey Kelly just met his brother Jimmy at Florian Silbereisen’s “100,000 Lights Advent Festival” and told the newspaper “Bild”: “As our return with the Kelly family in 2017, one of us has been in every show of Florian”. It’s just a pretty big family. However, there are probably no plans to rename the show to “100,000 Kellys advent Festival.”
We have “Gala” to thank for a fashion tip: “Mustard is the appetizing alternative to brown.” We weren’t even aware that brown was considered unappetizing, and I have no idea what associations “Gala” has with it. In any case, millions of Germans can now safely munch on their bratwursts at the Christmas markets, because an accident with the mustrich will make their outerwear even more appetizing in case of doubt. True trendsetters add a few splashes of mulled wine.
Talk about appetizing. According to the “Neue Blatt”, Jan Josef Liefers saeid that when he was studying in Berlin he “I think he had an addiction”. Namely the garlic: “I took some slices of dry bread, rubbed them with garlic and arranged them in my room like aroma lamps. Considering the typical Berlin student habitat, where one can conjure up a appetizing brunch with noodles instant and pizza crusts.” liefers will hardly have noticed. It’s also practical: unlike scented candles, if you get hungry you can always eat one of the loaves. As far as is known, Liefers in Berlin were also spared from vampire bites.
Pocket money for drinking
A pop singer continues another culinary tradition today: “GG Anderson receives an allowance for alcohol,” says “Bild,” and his wife allows him “three accidents in total per month.” Anderson himself says: “Every ten days Monika gives me 500 euros and takes me to the bar under her house. From five in the afternoon to five in the morning he drinks “20 beers, a grappa for each and smokes a chain”. After that “I stay in bed for two days and don’t drink alcohol for ten days”. Compared to how anderson’s room will smell after two days, Liefer’s Knofibude probably smelled like a Douglas fir. For us, intermittent drinking doesn’t feel like pleasure, but rather real hard work.
Marc Terenzi seems to be one step ahead.After all sorts of excesses, a toxic relationship experienced with great tabloid attention and retirement, the former boy band singer arrived at a training camp in turkey. “Yoga, running, no more drinking,” “bild” writes about the program on Monday this week. On Wednesday we see Terenzi’s back decorated with a tattoo of a tree: “He has yet to find his roots”, he describes “exclusively what this motif means to him”, obviously always in “Bild”. Let’s keep our fingers
crossed that Terenzi can put an end to this toxic relationship as soon as possible.